3 Reasons Women Leaders Are Amazing Just the Way We Are

February 10th by Lisa Petrilli

Readers: This blog post originally appeared at LeadSwag as part of their Women’s Leadership Month series.  I wanted to share it with each of you…

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This is the 3rd post in the Women’s Leadership Month series, and I couldn’t be more honored to be a part of it!  In keeping with the mission of sharing our own personal insights about leadership while adding a dash of fun, I thought I’d start by making a confession: I want Bruno Mars to sing to me.

Yes, it’s true, and not just any song – his hit song, “Just the Way You Are” (of course!). You know the words:

“Cause you’re amazing…just the way you are… You know, you know, you know I’d never ask you to change…if perfect’s what your searching for then just stay the same…” 

Delicious in every way.

Which leads me to another confession…I’m horrified by my first confession because, the reality is, as women we should believe in the depth and true essence of these words so completely and without even thinking about them that having Bruno Mars sing them to us should be an entire waste of our time.  Period.

And yet, many of us sometimes find ourselves having to remind and convince ourselves that we’re amazing as women, and as leaders, just the way we are.  I say 2011 is the year we change that! 

2011 is the year we embrace our femininity and all that it brings to our roles in life – including our leadership roles – and stop suppressing it; it’s the year we stop thinking we should act more like men from “9-5.”

My wish is that by the end of this year we no longer need to remind or convince ourselves – or our male colleagues – of the value of what we bring to the table as women leaders, including but certainly not limited to the following three vital attributes:

1. Commitment 

We love to commit – to our teams, to our goals and to our decisions.  We’re not afraid of commitment and we don’t necessarily think men are either – but we show our commitment more fully and more passionately as business leaders.  This is nothing but beneficial to our organization and to those who rely on us for clearly articulated direction.

2.  Win-Win

We understand what this means, believe in it profusely and understand the importance of it when collaborating or negotiating.  Our innate desire to make others happy is a HUGE benefit for us here because we can separate our ego from the issues in a negotiation or collaboration arrangement.  In my experience, this is much harder for men, and negotiations led by men tend to take longer and become more emotionally volatile.

Yes – isn’t that ironic?  We as women tend to be labeled “emotional” but I can tell you with years of negotiation experience behind me that tempers are more likely to flare when men are leading a negotiation, making it harder for parties to “give” and ultimately drive a true “win-win.” 

Women, inherently, want to “expand the pie” and find the solution enabling everyone to leave happy.

3. Power

Ladies, it is time to claim our own personal and collective power.  After all, wars have been fought over us since the beginning of time.  Since the beginning of time.

With the confidence and strength of our convictions and the unique depth of our insights and intuition we have the power to create inspiring visions and to lead others to it.  We have the power to recognize market changes and misalignments and to influence others to change course when necessary.  We have the power to motivate when possible and to compel when necessary.  And we alone have the power to believe in our dreams.

Advice for Men…

I encourage the men reading this post to start seeing the women leaders that you work with as amazing – just the way they are.  No, you don’t have to sing to them, but I encourage you to recognize – and ideally appreciate – everything they bring to the table that complements what you bring. 

And in performance reviews, 360 feedback initiatives, and everyday encounters, start noticing when you’re about to give a woman feedback that implies she should act more like a man.  Because being told we should act more like a man – more like you – threatens damage to the uniqueness, greatness and vibrancy that we bring to our roles.

I’d also argue that it makes you look weak, but we often need to be confident enough in ourselves to recognize this.

So ladies, will you join me in embracing our divine femininity  -our goddess power-  rather than suppressing it, as a critical part of being our authentic selves as women leaders?  I hope that’s a resounding, “Yes!”

And Bruno, go ahead and sing it, but please don’t take it personally if we Amazing Women of the World don’t pay much attention to the lyrics…

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You can find me on Twitter at @LisaPetrilli and on LinkedIn at http://www.linkedin.com/in/lisapetrilli. I look forward to seeing you there!You can also eMail me anytime at Lisa@CLevelStrategies.com

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Photo of Bruno Mars from Wikipedia.