This week at Leadership Chat we’re going to be tackling a subject that affects all of us as leaders and individuals: stress. How does stress impact our ability to be sustainable leaders, long-haul leaders who inspire our teams with a vision and then motivate our teams to work earnestly to realize that vision?
There is much research out there about the levels of stress and how much is healthy and unhealthy. It’s well known that while a small amount will lead to increased motivation and productivity, too much will lead to very serious physical and emotional challenges.
The important point for the purpose of this post and our upcoming conversation is this: there is a level at which it stops you from bringing your best self to your work.
I believe that much of what we describe as “stress” refers to the actual issues we grapple with that are below the surface level of our lives, such as fear, lack, or a sense of vulnerability. These are the issues we face deep within us that manifest themselves in the outward appearance of “stress,” and are what I believe hold us back from being better leaders.
So, in order to bring our full and best self to our work as leaders, we must first uncover – and then let go of – whatever it is that is holding us back.
Some questions to begin asking yourself to determine if these underlying factors might be holding you back include:
- What kind of energy am I bringing to my team each day? If it’s negative, what’s really underlying it? Fear? Something else?
- Do I have a support structure in my life in terms of people who truly listen to me and leave me feeling uplifted? If not, how can I develop this support structure?
- Am I allowing people who leave me drained to take up too much of my time and focus? Is it possible to restructure my relationships with these people so I don’t feel drained by them? If not, how can I rework things so we spend less time together or so this person is less dependent on me?
- Are there certain people or situations that automatically trigger within me a feeling of fear, vulnerability, victimization, or even emotions like anger or jealousy? If so, how can I let go of these emotions and rewire these triggers?
Letting go of what holds us back is never easy, it takes work. But by letting go, you free yourself to BE more of what moves you forward, and you empower yourself to serve others more purely, clearly and completely. Do you agree?
Join me, my stress-free Co-Host Steve Woodruff, and our Guest Host Christina Haxton tomorrow evening, January 17th at 8pm Eastern Time for a very lively #LeadershipChat on this topic! Click to learn how to join us at Leadership Chat.
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Photo is Stress Reduction by eamoncurry123.
9 Response Comments
I really like this, Lisa. You delivered more than I expected: Not tips on finding out whether I’m under stress (I already know) but excellent advice for handling the stress I’m under.
Dealing with difficult people could probably be an article in its own right. I like what you say about restructuring relationships. But sometimes it’s not an option to disengage — what if the difficult person is my boss? Even more essential, I think, is what you wrote in your last point: being aware of who the difficult people are and how they affect my emotions (“pull my triggers”). I probably can’t change the other person, but I can change myself and my actions.
Thanks again. I’m adding this to my growing collection of “C Level Strategies” articles, to return to it in the future.
Thank you, Larry, I appreciate that. You’re right, dealing with difficult people could probably be its own post – or a whole series! I think what’s important to realize is they’re “difficult” because of something about our own, personal interaction with them. Maybe there’s an underlying feeling that this person doesn’t value you…and so in conversations you’re more inclined to pick up any hint of this, whereas others would never see it. Or maybe it’s a feeling that this person doesn’t respect your need for work-life balance. Whatever it is, what’s important is to find the *underlying cause* and then see if you can either, (1) talk openly about it with that person and resolve it, (2) find other ways to resolve it (3) learn to “let it go” so that it does not cause you stress, by replacing the anger or frustration with forgiveness or acceptance (all of this is “for example,” of course), or ultimately (4) changing the situation if needed. I hope this helps and would love to have you join us for #LeadershipChat tomorrow evening!
Hello! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my good old room mate! He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this write-up to him. Fairly certain he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!
Great post Lisa. I find there is really little choice but to let go. At various points in my career the stress level was actually paralyzing. It paralyzed me so much that I could not even see my way out of it. It wasn’t until I was forced into making a career change that I could clearly see what stress had done to me professionally. Many lessons have been learned as a result of that experience. As leaders we need to monitor ourselves and our team members. It does little for productivity if we pile work on our people to the point where they start waving the white flag. Life needs balance. Thanks for the inspiration today!
Thanks for sharing your experience, Jonathan. Most importantly, you got out of that situation and are so much wiser because of the lesson. Yes, life needs balance as you say, and most people are afraid to wave the “white flag.” We don’t bring our best selves to our work if the stress gets in our way – hopefully leaders understand this and want this not only for their teams but for themselves as well. Hope to see you tonight. 🙂
Great article, Lisa. This is an issue that frequently comes up but not often addressed. I see companies stressed because they’re afraid of going under and end up sending the wrong messages to their customers. It’s easy to lose focus and get in the stress habit, some things that have worked well with my customers are:
1) Write down any and all distracting thoughts (you’d be surprised at how well it works to clear your mind).
2) Read over your mission statement.
3) Write down what kind of message you want your customers to receive.
4) Go over that every morning before going into the office.
Maryam,
These are such great suggestions! Thank you so much for sharing them here with the community – I sincerely appreciate it. It’s wonderful to know that they’ve worked successfully for you! All the best!